I know I've been rather remiss in posting to this blog, but many works at place of employment has successfully stopped me. But one thing has spurred me into action, yes I just had to let all of you know about the return of the IOL penis story.
Also there's a new Schpatdope out. It's on genetic memory and worth a read. Also apparently I offend a fringe religious group, go me!
Hey it's also my birthday today. Trev is going to give a budget speech today and if it warrants comment I pledge to you my faithful readers to deliver such comment with as much bias as possible.
Damnit, while I'm here I might as well tell you a little story form the weekend. Elisabeth was in PE visiting her dad, who is sick and in hospital, the whole weekend, so I took the opportunity to play a little poker online on saturday (btw firegolem I play on Poker Stars). I played pretty much the whole day and about 12 hours into it, while on my third meal of left over roast lamb, I was getting pretty tired and told the rest of the table that I'd had a long day and would be leaving soon. One of the other players commented that it did indeed look like I'd had some rough treatment. Huh? I thought. Then remembered that my avatar was a picture of me in zombie make-up from the Land of the Dead party. Lol, yeah 'Dead Tired' I said. About fifteen minutes of puns ensued about 'Dead Man's Hands', being 'card Dead' and when I started winning again 'Digging my way up'. This little exchange really energised me and I continued to play for another three hours booking a $15 win. At the end of the day I finished only a little up and I was very happy with my performance.
Oh and I chatted to Wil Wheaton during his poker tournament on friday.
While I'm on the subject of poker: I'm running a poker tournament at UCT on saturday. It's really small stakes (R25 buy-in) but if you don't already know about it and are interested get hold of me and I'll give you some details. On Monday I got a phone call from a friend of a friend of a friend who had heard about the tournament as was interested in joining in. I was quite keen as long as they were accompanied by the original friend, but what was really interesting was that this guy had heard about a Hold Em tournament that was going to be held at UCT in march as was wondering if this was it. Obviously it wasn't but that's the second time I've heard of a 'Big Game' being held at UCT, it's definitely moved squarely into the ranks of rumour. If anybody else hears anything about this I want to know!
Ok that's enough. And I'm sure you're all bored of poker.
schpat
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Monday, February 06, 2006
State of (INDIG)Nation
Anyway my weekend was good, yesterday I took Elisabeth out for a long scenic drive to McGregor near Robertson. It was a lot of fun and generally relaxing and enjoyable. There were two things I saw that shocked the shit out of me, not literally. The first one was shortly after exiting the tunnel we saw a baboon crossing the road, he was just ambling at a gentle pace expecting the world to stop for him. This is not surprising because he was the size of a large shetland pony! The second thing was two farm kids travelling on the back of their dad’s Toyota hilux. These were real “Plaas Suens” you know the kind that run around barefoot in shorts playing outside with their dogs and hunting small fury creatures, what was amazing was that one of them was wearing a pink golf shirt. They should be reported to Chuck Norris!
On our way back Elisabeth and I decided to stop at Grand West for the buffet because neither of us had eaten anything much all day. It’s a great deal at R95 but we were too late and they had stopped accepting walk-ins, although now you can book. We settled on a nice Italian restaurant and the food was very good and decently priced. I had a pasta with mushrooms, bacon, cream and chillies and Elisabeth has come calamari. It was yum. Afterwards Elisabeth went to House of Coffees while I spent some time at the Roulette table. I didn’t lose a spin in the hour that I played and walked way R145 up on a R100 stake, that’s a 145% ROI. When I when tell Elisabeth I found out that she’d been sitting that the coffee shop the whole time and nobody had even served her! I blew up at the management and we left.
We went to drop the car off with my folks, marvel at their new gigantic television and eventually got to bed at about 1am. Man it was a good weekend.
Now onto the political portion of this post. If you have no interest in South African politics I hope you enjoyed the first half of the post, but feel free to skip the rest, even though you should be informed! For the rest of you, here it is.
So, I was going to do a complete review of Thabo Mbeki’s State of the Nation address but I think that the almost 3% drop in on the JSE does a far better job of describing his weak attempt at sidestepping the issues far better than I ever could. I watched the address and then read the full text to make sure I hadn’t missed anything. The text was eighteen pages long, the first ten pages were about how bad apartheid was and how brilliant it was that some women killed herself by walking into the sea. Then there was about half a page about how happy everyone in South Africa is (according to international surveys), then about seven pages of what the government promises to do for us, and a final page about how bad apartheid was and how great the people who overcame it must be.
Did anyone else notice the complete failure to talk about what has already been delivered? Why this omission you ask? Well actually it’s quite simple, the government hasn’t delivered anything. Gasp! They’re too busy lining their own pocketsses and raping aids activists to even care about the people. So, what do they do when they eventually have to report back on their progress? Muddy the waters and confuse the issue, that’s what. Actually it’s a brilliant tactic, nobody in their politically correct, right mind could bad mouth you for being against apartheid, fortunately Schpat has never been politically correct.
When will the government or, to be more to the point, the ANC stop pushing the emotional buttons of segregation and oppression and actually start delivering to the people and earning their votes? The answer is probably never, ol’ bob from the north is still doing it today, and with great effect. As long as the general population, the people, of this country continue to allow themselves to be manipulated by politicians, that are too busy building empires to care about them, this country will not improve.
Politics is just like any other game, much more effective when everyone plays fair.
Oh I forgot to mention that almost an entire page was devoted to how we are going to prepare for the 2010 soccer world cup. And now the president is taking matters into his own hands and has instructed SAFA to explain to the presidential portfolio committee why BafanaBafana did so badly in the African Cup Of Nations. I’m glad that with oilgate, travelgate, gravy plane, and the zuma rape trial they have their priorities straight!
Indignantly
Schpat Out.
On our way back Elisabeth and I decided to stop at Grand West for the buffet because neither of us had eaten anything much all day. It’s a great deal at R95 but we were too late and they had stopped accepting walk-ins, although now you can book. We settled on a nice Italian restaurant and the food was very good and decently priced. I had a pasta with mushrooms, bacon, cream and chillies and Elisabeth has come calamari. It was yum. Afterwards Elisabeth went to House of Coffees while I spent some time at the Roulette table. I didn’t lose a spin in the hour that I played and walked way R145 up on a R100 stake, that’s a 145% ROI. When I when tell Elisabeth I found out that she’d been sitting that the coffee shop the whole time and nobody had even served her! I blew up at the management and we left.
We went to drop the car off with my folks, marvel at their new gigantic television and eventually got to bed at about 1am. Man it was a good weekend.
Now onto the political portion of this post. If you have no interest in South African politics I hope you enjoyed the first half of the post, but feel free to skip the rest, even though you should be informed! For the rest of you, here it is.
So, I was going to do a complete review of Thabo Mbeki’s State of the Nation address but I think that the almost 3% drop in on the JSE does a far better job of describing his weak attempt at sidestepping the issues far better than I ever could. I watched the address and then read the full text to make sure I hadn’t missed anything. The text was eighteen pages long, the first ten pages were about how bad apartheid was and how brilliant it was that some women killed herself by walking into the sea. Then there was about half a page about how happy everyone in South Africa is (according to international surveys), then about seven pages of what the government promises to do for us, and a final page about how bad apartheid was and how great the people who overcame it must be.
Did anyone else notice the complete failure to talk about what has already been delivered? Why this omission you ask? Well actually it’s quite simple, the government hasn’t delivered anything. Gasp! They’re too busy lining their own pocketsses and raping aids activists to even care about the people. So, what do they do when they eventually have to report back on their progress? Muddy the waters and confuse the issue, that’s what. Actually it’s a brilliant tactic, nobody in their politically correct, right mind could bad mouth you for being against apartheid, fortunately Schpat has never been politically correct.
When will the government or, to be more to the point, the ANC stop pushing the emotional buttons of segregation and oppression and actually start delivering to the people and earning their votes? The answer is probably never, ol’ bob from the north is still doing it today, and with great effect. As long as the general population, the people, of this country continue to allow themselves to be manipulated by politicians, that are too busy building empires to care about them, this country will not improve.
Politics is just like any other game, much more effective when everyone plays fair.
Oh I forgot to mention that almost an entire page was devoted to how we are going to prepare for the 2010 soccer world cup. And now the president is taking matters into his own hands and has instructed SAFA to explain to the presidential portfolio committee why BafanaBafana did so badly in the African Cup Of Nations. I’m glad that with oilgate, travelgate, gravy plane, and the zuma rape trial they have their priorities straight!
Indignantly
Schpat Out.
Thursday, February 02, 2006
Long Day
I’ve been up since 5:30 and I want to go home!
Last night I discovered that my PC is well and truly fubar. I can't even get it to start looking for an OS. I've tried everything and it's just completely screwed. I think it was probably damaged by the spate of power failures that we've had. I contacted my insurance provider and hey, guess what, they'll pay for repairs, zang.
A Johannesburg based group has petitioned Trevor Manual to make the costs of private broad band internet access tax deductible. They reckon that this will stimulate growth and broad band penetration. We'll have to wait for my birthday to find out what ol' Trev has in store for us.
If you want a good laugh check out some surprisingly interesting questions about bukkake etiquette raised by Lady Poker Player (one of the blogs I read regularly). Despite being a self confessed lover of poker and porn she only discovered bukkake like two days ago, wow.
Other than that, today is role playing, our rag-tag bunch of misfits is currently negotiating the transfer of a virus like (only on a much bigger scale) weapon of mass destruction in exchange for the services of a rather large and mean lizard. The way it works is this, we relieve the lizard of the burden of guarding the weapon and so he helps us win a war, it's a win win situation. Two weapons of mass destruction for the price of one.
But before that I need to fetch my PC so zenstar and synchronos can give it a once over.
Last night I discovered that my PC is well and truly fubar. I can't even get it to start looking for an OS. I've tried everything and it's just completely screwed. I think it was probably damaged by the spate of power failures that we've had. I contacted my insurance provider and hey, guess what, they'll pay for repairs, zang.
A Johannesburg based group has petitioned Trevor Manual to make the costs of private broad band internet access tax deductible. They reckon that this will stimulate growth and broad band penetration. We'll have to wait for my birthday to find out what ol' Trev has in store for us.
If you want a good laugh check out some surprisingly interesting questions about bukkake etiquette raised by Lady Poker Player (one of the blogs I read regularly). Despite being a self confessed lover of poker and porn she only discovered bukkake like two days ago, wow.
Other than that, today is role playing, our rag-tag bunch of misfits is currently negotiating the transfer of a virus like (only on a much bigger scale) weapon of mass destruction in exchange for the services of a rather large and mean lizard. The way it works is this, we relieve the lizard of the burden of guarding the weapon and so he helps us win a war, it's a win win situation. Two weapons of mass destruction for the price of one.
But before that I need to fetch my PC so zenstar and synchronos can give it a once over.
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Chuck Norris does not wear pink!
Wow, what is it with pink shirts? Working in a building with a good deal of "fashion" people I noticed a few of the men here wearing pink shirts as far back as six months ago, and I thought it was gay. Now, every second guy out there is wearing a damn pink shirt. It's bloody peer pressure I tell you! If you could go up to the average guy wearing a pink shirt in the street, go back in time six months and offer him a pink shirt for free, he'd probably beat the living shit out of you in homophobic rage. I've got nothing against gay men, brokeback mountain sounds kinda cool, but pink shirts are just so girlie!
Speaking of Brokeback Mountain, here's an alternate concocted by DJ Coffman of Yirmumah fame. Ladies I'm going to bet that you have no problem getting you man to tag along for: Bareback Mountain.......
Check this out, at worst it's a brilliant scam, at best it's kinda gross. These guys over at LifeGem will take the 'carbon remains' of a loved one and turn them into a diamond for you. What's more, they only need 8oz, or about a cup, of ashes to do it. Can you imagine losing a leg and having that made into your own personal gem.
And on the Living in South Africa Front
It's always good news when we find out that Capetonians may face power rationing. Yes they recon they may have to ration our power over the winter months to make sure the recent power failures are not repeated. Speaking of power failures I'd better just save this post quickly.
Also nice to see that certain factions within the ANC are opposing others that are calling for another presidential term for Thabo Mbeki. I do however suspect that they are opposing the extra term not for their love of the constitution, as they'd have us believe, but rather for their dislike of the prez. Don't you guys out there think that it's strange that the ones opposing an extra term for Thabo were JZ's biggest supporters?
Other Stupid People Around the World
A shipment of frozen beef going into Bulgaria was stopped by customs officials when they noticed that it was 22 years old. According to the health certificate it was loaded in Ireland in 1984! The dodgy paperwork wasn't what tipped them off though, it was that the meat was blue.
What would you expect to find when reading the ingredients label on a pack of sliced cooked ham? Well no matter how disgusting your answer I'm sure it's better that "Dog Shit". That's what some dude in the UK found listed when he inspected the product in a local store. The company who makes the ham denies using faecal matter in its product and claims to have fired the prankster responsible for the labelling joke, but we know the truth. Next time you think to yourself "Man, this sandwich tastes like shit!", you'll check for ham right?
Anyway, I'm reinstalling windows tonight, wish me luck.
schpat
Speaking of Brokeback Mountain, here's an alternate concocted by DJ Coffman of Yirmumah fame. Ladies I'm going to bet that you have no problem getting you man to tag along for: Bareback Mountain.......
Check this out, at worst it's a brilliant scam, at best it's kinda gross. These guys over at LifeGem will take the 'carbon remains' of a loved one and turn them into a diamond for you. What's more, they only need 8oz, or about a cup, of ashes to do it. Can you imagine losing a leg and having that made into your own personal gem.
And on the Living in South Africa Front
It's always good news when we find out that Capetonians may face power rationing. Yes they recon they may have to ration our power over the winter months to make sure the recent power failures are not repeated. Speaking of power failures I'd better just save this post quickly.
Also nice to see that certain factions within the ANC are opposing others that are calling for another presidential term for Thabo Mbeki. I do however suspect that they are opposing the extra term not for their love of the constitution, as they'd have us believe, but rather for their dislike of the prez. Don't you guys out there think that it's strange that the ones opposing an extra term for Thabo were JZ's biggest supporters?
Other Stupid People Around the World
A shipment of frozen beef going into Bulgaria was stopped by customs officials when they noticed that it was 22 years old. According to the health certificate it was loaded in Ireland in 1984! The dodgy paperwork wasn't what tipped them off though, it was that the meat was blue.
What would you expect to find when reading the ingredients label on a pack of sliced cooked ham? Well no matter how disgusting your answer I'm sure it's better that "Dog Shit". That's what some dude in the UK found listed when he inspected the product in a local store. The company who makes the ham denies using faecal matter in its product and claims to have fired the prankster responsible for the labelling joke, but we know the truth. Next time you think to yourself "Man, this sandwich tastes like shit!", you'll check for ham right?
Anyway, I'm reinstalling windows tonight, wish me luck.
schpat
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Arrgh, I hate computers!!
Well I don’t really, I just hate it when computers don’t behave properly. My PC had some kind of meltdown yesterday and now won’t start up. This was after I spent a significant part of Saturday reinstalling the OS and patching it up the wazoo. Some of the windows files are corrupted and I suppose a reinstall or s repair is in order, oh joy. But I will get it working. Oh yes, I will get it working!
I was thinking about Wayne’s World the other night. Then I started thinking about The Wonder Years, that was a rocking show. Btw, Kevin’s brother’s name was Wayne. Also Fred Savage’s brother Ben played Cory in Boy Meets World. Ben Feldman, from Living With Fran is not Corey Feldman’s brother, although Corey’s mom was a Playboy Playmate.
YOU CAN’T TAKE THE SKY FROM ME
OK here’s the point where I rally all my readers together. If you didn’t know about it, it looks like an independent production company (read as a group of dedicated fans) is trying to revive Joss Whedon’s stalled space opera “Firefly”. Apparently they are looking at buying the rights and making the show available on a subscription basis. Now those of you who have taken into my confidence will know that last year when they too Star Trek off the silver screen I suggested a very similar method of keeping it alive. Needless to say I think it’s a great idea and totally has the potential to succeed. At the moment they’re gaining market intelligence by taking a survey, they promise that you won’t get any gorram spam. If you thought that this was the best show in the whole wide ‘verse then go fill in the survey.
The difference between this plan and my Star Trek plan is that with the original I was getting in on the ground floor and making millions, whereas here I hopefully get to see a few more episodes of Firefly with little or no effort. I can’t really decide which one actually works out better for me.
Go visit their site!
I was thinking about Wayne’s World the other night. Then I started thinking about The Wonder Years, that was a rocking show. Btw, Kevin’s brother’s name was Wayne. Also Fred Savage’s brother Ben played Cory in Boy Meets World. Ben Feldman, from Living With Fran is not Corey Feldman’s brother, although Corey’s mom was a Playboy Playmate.
YOU CAN’T TAKE THE SKY FROM ME
OK here’s the point where I rally all my readers together. If you didn’t know about it, it looks like an independent production company (read as a group of dedicated fans) is trying to revive Joss Whedon’s stalled space opera “Firefly”. Apparently they are looking at buying the rights and making the show available on a subscription basis. Now those of you who have taken into my confidence will know that last year when they too Star Trek off the silver screen I suggested a very similar method of keeping it alive. Needless to say I think it’s a great idea and totally has the potential to succeed. At the moment they’re gaining market intelligence by taking a survey, they promise that you won’t get any gorram spam. If you thought that this was the best show in the whole wide ‘verse then go fill in the survey.
The difference between this plan and my Star Trek plan is that with the original I was getting in on the ground floor and making millions, whereas here I hopefully get to see a few more episodes of Firefly with little or no effort. I can’t really decide which one actually works out better for me.
Go visit their site!
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